Things I Thought of on the Drive from Houston

1) In the future, we may have so many CSI spin offs that they will run out of Who songs to use as the theme music. If this happens, I suggest they move on to Who members solo projects. Thus, every episode of CSI: Peoria will begin with Let My Love Open the Door by Pete Townshend.

2) If you think about, My Best Friend's Girl by the Cars could be an answer to Jessie's Girl by Rick Springfield. Maybe Rick Springfield finally stole away Jessie's Girl, and then Rik Ocasek is Jessie and he's thinking about how his Best Friend's Girl used to be his. Unfortunately, on further research, the songs came out in the wrong order for this to be true. What a damn shame, because it would make one hell of a story.

3) I ended up listening to a "Classic Country" station that played "Hello Darlin'" by Conway Twitty and "You Were Always on My Mind" by Willie Nelson. I thought about how sad the songs were and how many people could relate to them. "El Paso" by Marty Robbins played next, and I considered driving to El Paso and shooting a cowboy over a Mexican girl, in order to relate to this song as well. Then I realized that I had no idea what direction to drive in order to reach El Paso. Besides, "Big Bad John" by Jimmy Dean and "Louisiana Saturday Night" by Mel McDaniel were on, and there is no way I'm going to rescue a bunch of miners while playing the fiddle and eating possum with my fifteen kids. I guess the point of this story is "The best laid schemes o’ mice an’ men / Gang aft a-gley.”

4) Nobody says "Great Caesar's Ghost" anymore. I wonder if Caesar is happy about this becaue it must get pretty annoying to have people shout out your name all the time when they aren't really trying to get your attention. I bet Caesar's Ghost was always showing up and going "What?" and the person would say "Oh sorry, just expressing surprise." That would have gotten old really fast.